Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Responding To Statements Of Adolescents

Responding To Statements Of Adolescents - We all remember having heard phrases older that for some reason or another you is we have been recorded. Who has not heard that from 'you who believe, what am Bank Spain? 'when asked for money?

Often we do not realize the importance of what we hear about. Customs are like folders with information that is recorded in our brain and we there forever so that our central computer uses when necessary.

Phrases adolescents and adolescent parents phrases

 Teenage girl with parents background

The same happens with those phrases we have heard our parents; when we fly at the time of our life we ​​give the interpretation it deserves. Many of them are part of the popular wisdom that part of education that we acquire subliminally and we then is as valid.

Many of us grew up listening to phrases like 'while living in this house you do what I tell' and saying other as 'my parents do not listen to me' or 'you are always against what I say'. There are phrases we said when we were teenagers we'll listen now as parents. This is a great advantage because it assumes that we know something because we've lived, allowing us to properly use our weapons and empathize with this very difficult stage that is adolescence.

What teens feel

It is important that we connect with how we felt when we said those phrases in our adolescent stage. Close your eyes for one second, repeat one of those phrases and try to feel what we felt at that moment. What happened? We are not again feel the emotion of incomprehension we felt then ?

Our parents did not listen to us, they wanted to always be right, did not understand what was important to us. Many we realize when we are adults that our parents did the best they could, taking the best they were taught. When we are young we feel that our parents are always against what we say but upon reaching adulthood can come to empathize with what they felt, fear they could feel when faced with the unknown, that world posed him a teenager wanting to be himself.

Because that is one of the main objectives of adolescents: be yourself, become that person who makes a mistake and learn from it, who wants to discover by himself new things, different way to do it.

Tips for improving communication with teenagers

Target parents: listen, not argue, understand and advise our teenage children.

1. First, let's take awareness that listening is hearing more play. What we have to learn is to listen, empathic way to help us connect with emotion, being attentive to what he says and feels our son. We must be patient and paraphrasing what he tells us to confirm that we have understood. Do not forget that for us one of the hardest things is to put our internal radio; It is the hardest work we do.

2. Furthermore, we should never make judgments; we must be aware that constantly make judgments, so we must be aware of it.

3. Nor should we discuss, we must stop interrupting assuming we know what the other is going to say because then we would get to its height, we would be putting our power over him.

4. It is important to confirm that what we understand has to do with what they feel and, finally, always ask if they want our advice and help from our experience.